So, as I am driving home for Christmas with my mom after these blasted finals are done, she requested that we listen to only Christmas music for the whole drive. The drive home is 5 1/2 hours. So what did I do? I found five and a half hours of Christmas music. I think I repeat....two songs...if that. There are 102 songs, and actually it's over 5 1/2 hours...which is good because I can guarantee my mother will not like all of them. Yes ladies and gentlemen it just may be the most epic Christmas mix ever created. And because I'm a good person...and I'm avoiding homework I thought I would share this epic mix with you:
(In alphabetical order)
1. All I Want For Christmas – Mariah Carey
2. All That I Want – The Weepies
3. And the Angels Cried – Alan Jackson ft. Allison Krause
4. Angels Among Us – Randy Travis
5. Angels We Have Heard On High – Josh Groban
6. Auld Lang Syne – Marc Anthony
7. Ave Maria – Josh Groban
8. Away in a Manger – Reba McEntire
9. Baby, It’s Cold Outside – Bing Crosby ft. Doris Day
10. Believe – Josh Groban
11. Bells Are Ringing 0 Mary Chapin Carpenter
12. Bells Will Be Ringing – Bon Jovi
13. Blame It On the Mistletoe – Toby Keith
14. Blue Christmas – Elvis
15. Breathe of Heaven – Amy Grant
16. Carol of the Bells – Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir
17. Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) – Hanson
18. Christmas Don’t Be Late – Chipmunks
19. Christmas For Cowboys – Jars of Clay
20. Christmas in Killarney – Barra MacNeils
21. Christmas is All Around – Billy Mack
22. Christmas Medley – Nsync
23. Christmas Medley – Barenaked Ladies
24. Christmas Shoes – Alabama
25. Christmas Song – Michael Buble
26. Christmas Song – The Raveonettes
27. A Christmas to Remember – Kenny & Dolly
28. Christmas Without You – Kenny & Dolly
29. Christmas Wrapping – Spice Girls
30. Christmases When You Were Mine – Taylor Swift
31. Do They Know It’s Christmas? – Band Aid (Original)
32. Do You Hear What I Hear? – Whitney Houston
33. Donde Esta Santa Clause – Guster
34. Driving Home For Christmas – Chris Rea
35. Fairytale of New York – the Pogues ft. Kirsty MacColl
36. Feliz Navidad – Jose Feliciano
37. The First Noel – Crash Test Dummies
38. The Friendly Beasts – Garth Brooks
39. Give Love on Christmas Day – Solid Harmony
40. Go Tell It On the Mountain – Garth Brooks
41. The Greatest Gift of All – Kenny & Dolly
42. Hanukkah Song – Adam Sandler
43. Happy Christmas (War is Over) – John Lennon
44. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas – Diana Krall
45. Here Comes Santa Clause – Gene Autry
46. Holly Jolly Christmas – Burl Ives
47. I Believe in Father Christmas – greg Lake
48. I believe in Santa Clause – Kenny & Dolly
49. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause – Jackson 5
50. I Still Believe in Santa Clause – New Kids on the Block
51. I’ll Be Home For Christmas – Josh Groban
52. I’ll Be Home For Christmas – Michael Buble
53. I’m Getting’ Nuttin’ For Christmas – Barry Gordon
54. It Must’ve Been Ol’ Santa Clause – Harry Connick Jr
55. It Wasn’t His Child – Trisha Yearwood
56. It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas – Johnny Mathis
57. It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year – Andy Williams
58. Jingle Bell Rock – Home Alone 2
59. Joseph, Better You Than Me – the Killers ft. Elton John
60. Last Christmas – Taylor Swift
61. Let It Snow! – Dean Martin
62. Little Drummer Boy – Jackson 5
63. Little Drummer Boy/ Peace on Earth – David Bowie ft. Bing Crosby
64. Little Saint Nick – The Beach Boys
65. Mary Did You Know? – Kenny Rogers & Wynona Judd
66. Mary Had a Baby – Bruce Cockburn
67. Maybe This Christmas – Ron Sexsmith
68. Merry Christmas Baby – Otis Redding
69. Merry Christmas Everybody – Slade
70. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays - NSync
71. Must Be Santa – Raffi
72. My Grown Up Christmas List – Kelly Clarkson
73. My Only Wish This Year – Britney Spears
74. O Come All Ye Faithful – Art Garfunkle
75. Oh Holy Night – Chantel Kreviazuk & Avril Lavigne
76. Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree – Brenda Lee
77. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer – Gene Autry
78. Santa Clause is Coming To Town – Jackson 5
79. Santa Clause is Coming to Town – Bruce Springsteen
80. Santa Looked A Lot Like Daddy – Garth Brooks
81. Silent Night – Boyz II Men
82. Silver Bells – Stevie Wonder
83. Sleigh Ride – Amy Grant
84. Sleigh Ride – Barenaked Ladies
85. Someday At Christmas – Stevie Wonder
86. Something About Christmastime – Bryan Adams
87. Step Into Christmas – Elton John
88. A Strange Way to Save the World – 4Him
89. Thank God It’s Christmas – Queen
90. (There’s No Place Like) Home for the Holidays – Garth Brooks
91. This Christmas – the Temptations
92. What Child is This – the Judds
93. When Christmas Comes to Town – the Polar Express
94. When My Heart Finds Christmas – Harry Connick jr.
95. Where Are You Christmas – Faith Hill
96. White Christmas – Kenny & Dolly
97. Winter Wonderland – Tony Bennet
98. Winter Sleigh Ride – Kenny & Dolly
99. With Bells On – Kenny & Dolly
100. Wodnerful Christmastime – Paul McCartney
101. 364 days to Go – Brad Paisley
102. 2000 Miles – the Pretenders
Yep. What's Next? Dividing them into CD's. Homework be Damned.
Friday, December 05, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
UPDATE
So the headache scenario is either something really not serious or something really serious. Doctors are so reassuring that way. I went to a doctor ho actually took me seriously and did a bunch of really weird tests like "close your eyes really tight and i'm going to try adn open them with my fingers" and "make luke perry forehead hold it and then let it go" etc. And then he prescribed some fancy muscle relaxer thing and some painkillers which are making class quite enjoyable.
Then sent me for blood work and told me it might be some sort of mutant brain infection.
Sigh.
So the headache scenario is either something really not serious or something really serious. Doctors are so reassuring that way. I went to a doctor ho actually took me seriously and did a bunch of really weird tests like "close your eyes really tight and i'm going to try adn open them with my fingers" and "make luke perry forehead hold it and then let it go" etc. And then he prescribed some fancy muscle relaxer thing and some painkillers which are making class quite enjoyable.
Then sent me for blood work and told me it might be some sort of mutant brain infection.
Sigh.
Friday, October 24, 2008
If that's All You Will Be - You'll Be A Waste of Time
So as hard it is to pay attention and keep up with the ridiculous assignments that keep coming my way it is infinitely harder when I have a headache that simply will not go away.
I have tried the drugs. Of course I'm off the whole caffeine thing so i can't take any of the good drugs. But Advil is supposed to make head aches go away. So I've been taking it religiously for three days at every four hour mark, warning on the label be damned.
I've tried drinking a stupid amount of water with the inane hopes that it was a dehydration thing. It wasn't. And I had to pee for hours.
I've tried the pressure points which mostly just hurt and made it worse.
I have tried everything. Except the doctor. Because I don't want to sit in a waiting room for hours only to have a doctor tell me it's stress and to take some Advil. I swear I would punch someone.
There is nothing i want to do less than sit in the ER waiting room hoping to be taken seriously. Nothing.
At the same time. I would really appreciate if my head would stop pounding because I have assignments to get done and a midterm to study for.
I have tried the drugs. Of course I'm off the whole caffeine thing so i can't take any of the good drugs. But Advil is supposed to make head aches go away. So I've been taking it religiously for three days at every four hour mark, warning on the label be damned.
I've tried drinking a stupid amount of water with the inane hopes that it was a dehydration thing. It wasn't. And I had to pee for hours.
I've tried the pressure points which mostly just hurt and made it worse.
I have tried everything. Except the doctor. Because I don't want to sit in a waiting room for hours only to have a doctor tell me it's stress and to take some Advil. I swear I would punch someone.
There is nothing i want to do less than sit in the ER waiting room hoping to be taken seriously. Nothing.
At the same time. I would really appreciate if my head would stop pounding because I have assignments to get done and a midterm to study for.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
in-class
Professional Prose is boring and lame. I really don't want to learn any more about professional prose or internal communications or annual reports. This is what I was trying to avoid by coming to writing school. SO onto PLAN B
PLAN B
I'm going to apply to graduate in April with a Diploma in Professional Writing, from what I've found it is just as good as having a degree.
THEN I work my ass of all summer at a job that I have yet to acquire and get some money.
THEN I move my ass to Vancouver to go to VFS which was originally plan A but got bumped in favor of a "real education" Well screw a real education, life is too short to not have fun. I mean really.
There are only a couple problems in my plan. One I don't have a job. Two I haven't actually gotten into the school yet. Which is daunting. The program requirements are: A 1-page (maximum) synopsis of a feature film or television project that you are passionate about making. Provide the film genre and utilize references to other movies to explain how you would make the film. Explain the concept, vision or idea. In addition provide a minimum of two and maximum of four other creative writing samples in their original form (no more than 20 total pages should be submitted).
I stole that from the website. Which leads me to another problem...i don't have a movie or script that i'm passionate about making. I mean I have tons. None that I think would actually work. Also explaining the concept the vision the idea....might make me vomit.
Ah finally a class break.
PLAN B
I'm going to apply to graduate in April with a Diploma in Professional Writing, from what I've found it is just as good as having a degree.
THEN I work my ass of all summer at a job that I have yet to acquire and get some money.
THEN I move my ass to Vancouver to go to VFS which was originally plan A but got bumped in favor of a "real education" Well screw a real education, life is too short to not have fun. I mean really.
There are only a couple problems in my plan. One I don't have a job. Two I haven't actually gotten into the school yet. Which is daunting. The program requirements are: A 1-page (maximum) synopsis of a feature film or television project that you are passionate about making. Provide the film genre and utilize references to other movies to explain how you would make the film. Explain the concept, vision or idea. In addition provide a minimum of two and maximum of four other creative writing samples in their original form (no more than 20 total pages should be submitted).
I stole that from the website. Which leads me to another problem...i don't have a movie or script that i'm passionate about making. I mean I have tons. None that I think would actually work. Also explaining the concept the vision the idea....might make me vomit.
Ah finally a class break.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Instead of writing an Advanced Composition Essay...
So while I was looking for Kevin Smith clips from the show I found a few more awesome clips that have nothing to with Kevin Smith on YouTube. Also I found a site called YouPorn which I had no idea existed, but I won't post any of those videos...they were mostly creepy anyway. I mean if you can't get into real porn maybe you should just not do porn. That sounded way wittier in my head. Whatever.
OKAY so non-Kevin Smith YouTube video number one....
The day after the People's Choice Awards where Ellen DeGeneres won best talk show host Stephen Colbert opened his show with this, and then Ellen found it and put a clip on her show:
And I laughed for days and days and days. Especially when Ellen showed the clip on her show...made it that much better.
Non-Kevin Smith video number two:
HEY WAIT so Kevin Smith actually showed up on VMars. I mean he's not in the clip but still....not the point. The point is that someone on YouTube took two of my fave things and added them together to make one AWESOME thing:
Non-Kevin Smith Videos 3 & 4:
I always say that Tegan and Sara have the best onstage banter of anyone ever. So i found a couple videos to prove it. These are from an outdoor concert in Yellowknife that they did a few years back.
The second Tegan and Sara vid repeats a bit of the last video but wade through it, Sara screws up in the song and it makes me happy.
and now I head home for Thanksgiving to eat my weight in turkey and fixins. Hopefully I'll cram everyone in somehow, even though I'm only going to be home for a few days and going to see Deryk is kind of a priority. But yes so I will be home sometime around 7 probably...maybe 8. I'm super stoked to see my dog. I'll take pictures and post them. But just of my dog.
OKAY so non-Kevin Smith YouTube video number one....
The day after the People's Choice Awards where Ellen DeGeneres won best talk show host Stephen Colbert opened his show with this, and then Ellen found it and put a clip on her show:
And I laughed for days and days and days. Especially when Ellen showed the clip on her show...made it that much better.
Non-Kevin Smith video number two:
HEY WAIT so Kevin Smith actually showed up on VMars. I mean he's not in the clip but still....not the point. The point is that someone on YouTube took two of my fave things and added them together to make one AWESOME thing:
Non-Kevin Smith Videos 3 & 4:
I always say that Tegan and Sara have the best onstage banter of anyone ever. So i found a couple videos to prove it. These are from an outdoor concert in Yellowknife that they did a few years back.
The second Tegan and Sara vid repeats a bit of the last video but wade through it, Sara screws up in the song and it makes me happy.
and now I head home for Thanksgiving to eat my weight in turkey and fixins. Hopefully I'll cram everyone in somehow, even though I'm only going to be home for a few days and going to see Deryk is kind of a priority. But yes so I will be home sometime around 7 probably...maybe 8. I'm super stoked to see my dog. I'll take pictures and post them. But just of my dog.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
So I'm not a huge fan of putting stuff on YouTube, especially stuff that you don't have the rights to, so I'm not putting my videos of Kevin Smith on the internet. The video I took is for me so I can giggle when I'm depressed.
Luckily someone else did it for me. Of course the video quality is shit but whatever.
the first clip is of the "lecture" he gave when he walked in and was talking about Air Canada:
the second clip is a response to the question "What does 'spiritual' mean to you?" Apparently according to Kevin Smith it means praying right before the plane takes off:
While it's not much it's a little window into what that night was like all night.
enjoy!
Luckily someone else did it for me. Of course the video quality is shit but whatever.
the first clip is of the "lecture" he gave when he walked in and was talking about Air Canada:
the second clip is a response to the question "What does 'spiritual' mean to you?" Apparently according to Kevin Smith it means praying right before the plane takes off:
While it's not much it's a little window into what that night was like all night.
enjoy!
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Like A Retarded Kid LookIng At A Ferris Wheel
An Evening With Kevin Smith just ended and while I wish it could have gone on indefinitely I don't think my lungs could take anymore.
I have never laughed that hard. Ever. In my entire life. I laughed so hard I got light headed from lack of oxygen. At least I didn't pass out like the one guy who asked him a question. Seriously a dude passed out. Luckily three people caught him.
"You guys are like the Justice League!" Kevin exclaimed multiple times before deciding "Fuck the Justice League you guys are like Alpha Flight!"
The highlights are too many to count. And while i'm trying desperately to cling to all of the memories I'm sure I've forgotten a few. And I'm equally sure that they will come to me at the most inappropriate times causing me to burst into a fit of giggles.
I can't decide on a top story.
Maybe the story about how his miniature wiener dog got fucked by his golden retriever. "He didn't even really fuck her he wore her like a little doggie condom."
Maybe how when Harley admitted her knowledge of Zack and Miri's entire title (Zack and Miri Make A Porno) and they asked her if she knew what a porno was she replied "It's how you make a livin'"
Maybe about the benefits of convenience stores that deliver right to your bedroom.
Maybe about how when you're watching a movie on a 103 inch flat screen it's like you're in the movie. Especially Live Free Die Hard. ""cause i'm sitting there for the first bit chattin with Maclean and then all of a sudden a guy who looks just like me shows up. And i stand up and we're the same height..."
Maybe how he quizzed a gay couple about who was the top and who was the bottom and how much it would cost to get an onstage head-show.
Maybe how he coerced some kid into proposing to his girlfriend.
Maybe the one about how he smoked way too much weed and ate too much and got so big that he cracked the porcelain of a toilet seat. Not pulled it off of the water damaged wall, but actually cracked the porcelain. "Do you know how hard it is to crack porcelain without a hammer?" This was the concluding line to a story that described in-depth description of his wiping technique. HOw he used to pull front, like a chick, but his gut gets in the way now and he can't reach so he has to pull from behind. But it's an art in Kevin's case because he pulls one cheek to one side of the toilet and one to the other so the "shit can drop straight and not hit my ample ass cheeks". Then comes the first wipe where you get the big junk. Then comes a dig. yes a dig. "you wipe the toilet paper around your finger and dig. yeah that's kinda gay but if a chick wants to eat my ass I can be like, you'll have no problems down there."
I know I'm missing so much awesome. But my stomach hurts from laughing. I do have a few pictures and a super-sneaky video about Air Canada's revenge AND a t-shirt. But I don't know how to post videos and I'm too lazy to upload them.
I feel bad for anyone who wasn't there. Especially if they are fans of Kevin.
This man has no share-line. And I love every second of it.
EDIT: I knew I was going to forget a funny part: The first question of the evening was whether or not Jason Lee being a Scientologist had affected their relationship. So Kevin told us how he found out. They were sitting around before a reading for Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and they were shooting the shit, and Scientology came up. So everyone was talking about how they eat babies, and how at the final class you find out that you're and alien. And through all of this Jason Lee was just looking uncomfortable so Kevin called him on it and Jason Lee was like "I know a bit about Scientology and I just want you to know that all of that is wrong." and Kevin was like what do you mean? and Jason Lee was like "I just know a lot about it." and Kevin was being all nice and shit being like "Dude are you a Scientologist? Because if you are that's cool just let us know." And Jason Lee said "Yeah I am." And Kevin responded "Oh you fucking idiot!" and they don't talk about it anymore...
I have never laughed that hard. Ever. In my entire life. I laughed so hard I got light headed from lack of oxygen. At least I didn't pass out like the one guy who asked him a question. Seriously a dude passed out. Luckily three people caught him.
"You guys are like the Justice League!" Kevin exclaimed multiple times before deciding "Fuck the Justice League you guys are like Alpha Flight!"
The highlights are too many to count. And while i'm trying desperately to cling to all of the memories I'm sure I've forgotten a few. And I'm equally sure that they will come to me at the most inappropriate times causing me to burst into a fit of giggles.
I can't decide on a top story.
Maybe the story about how his miniature wiener dog got fucked by his golden retriever. "He didn't even really fuck her he wore her like a little doggie condom."
Maybe how when Harley admitted her knowledge of Zack and Miri's entire title (Zack and Miri Make A Porno) and they asked her if she knew what a porno was she replied "It's how you make a livin'"
Maybe about the benefits of convenience stores that deliver right to your bedroom.
Maybe about how when you're watching a movie on a 103 inch flat screen it's like you're in the movie. Especially Live Free Die Hard. ""cause i'm sitting there for the first bit chattin with Maclean and then all of a sudden a guy who looks just like me shows up. And i stand up and we're the same height..."
Maybe how he quizzed a gay couple about who was the top and who was the bottom and how much it would cost to get an onstage head-show.
Maybe how he coerced some kid into proposing to his girlfriend.
Maybe the one about how he smoked way too much weed and ate too much and got so big that he cracked the porcelain of a toilet seat. Not pulled it off of the water damaged wall, but actually cracked the porcelain. "Do you know how hard it is to crack porcelain without a hammer?" This was the concluding line to a story that described in-depth description of his wiping technique. HOw he used to pull front, like a chick, but his gut gets in the way now and he can't reach so he has to pull from behind. But it's an art in Kevin's case because he pulls one cheek to one side of the toilet and one to the other so the "shit can drop straight and not hit my ample ass cheeks". Then comes the first wipe where you get the big junk. Then comes a dig. yes a dig. "you wipe the toilet paper around your finger and dig. yeah that's kinda gay but if a chick wants to eat my ass I can be like, you'll have no problems down there."
I know I'm missing so much awesome. But my stomach hurts from laughing. I do have a few pictures and a super-sneaky video about Air Canada's revenge AND a t-shirt. But I don't know how to post videos and I'm too lazy to upload them.
I feel bad for anyone who wasn't there. Especially if they are fans of Kevin.
This man has no share-line. And I love every second of it.
EDIT: I knew I was going to forget a funny part: The first question of the evening was whether or not Jason Lee being a Scientologist had affected their relationship. So Kevin told us how he found out. They were sitting around before a reading for Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and they were shooting the shit, and Scientology came up. So everyone was talking about how they eat babies, and how at the final class you find out that you're and alien. And through all of this Jason Lee was just looking uncomfortable so Kevin called him on it and Jason Lee was like "I know a bit about Scientology and I just want you to know that all of that is wrong." and Kevin was like what do you mean? and Jason Lee was like "I just know a lot about it." and Kevin was being all nice and shit being like "Dude are you a Scientologist? Because if you are that's cool just let us know." And Jason Lee said "Yeah I am." And Kevin responded "Oh you fucking idiot!" and they don't talk about it anymore...
Monday, September 29, 2008
My DVD's up to date....
So i made this list...and it makes most people think that I'm crazy but I love movies they are what I do. SO here goes....
3:10 to Yuma
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
Across the Universe
The Addams Family
Adventures in Babysitting
The Adventures of Indiana Jones - The Complete DVD Movie Collection
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
Almost Famous - The Director's Cut
American Psycho
Angel - Season One
Angel - Season Three
Angel - Season Two
Angel – Season Four
Angel – Season Five
The Aristocrats
Arrested Development - Season One
Arrested Development - Season Three
Arrested Development - Season Two
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Atlantis - The Lost Empire
Bad News Bears
Batman Begins
Battlestar Galactica - Season One
Battlestar Galactica - Razor
Battlestar Galactica - Season 2.0
Battlestar Galactica - Season Three
Battlestar Galactica: Season 2.5
Benny And Joon
Beyond Borders
Big Fish
Biker Boyz
Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
Billy Madison
Bio-Dome
The Birdcage
Blade
Blade II
Blade Runner: The Final Cut
Blade: Trinity
Blow
Blue Hawaii
The Bone Collector by
Bonnie and Clyde by Arthur Penn
The Boondock Saints - Unrated by Troy Duffy
Breakfast at Tiffany's by Blake Edwards
The Breakfast Club by John Hughes
BtVS - Season 1 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 2 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 3 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 4 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 5 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 6 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 7 by Joss Whedon
Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Fran Rubel Kuzui
Casablanca by Scott Benson (II), Douglas McCarthy, Michael Curtiz
Catch and Release by Susannah Grant
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Tim Burton
Chasing Amy by Kevin Smith
Chicken Little by Mark Dindal
Chocolat by Lasse Hallström
The Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by
Clerks - The Animated Series Uncensored by Steve Loter,
Clerks II by Kevin Smith
Clerks X by Kevin Smith
Clueless by Amy Heckerling
The Commitments by
Corpse Bride by Mike Johnson, Tim Burton
The Covenant by Renny Harlin
Crash by Paul Haggis
Criminal Minds - The First Season by Charles Haid, Richard Shepard
Daredevil by Mark Steven Johnson
Dark Angel - The Complete First Season by
Dark Angel: The Complete Second Season by Kenneth Biller,
The Dark Crystal by Henson, Jim, Oz, Frank
Dawson's Creek - The Complete First Season by James
Dawson's Creek - The Complete Fourth Season by James
Dawson's Creek - The Complete Second Season by James
The Day After Tomorrow by Roland Emmerich
Dazed & Confused by Richard Linklater
Dead Like Me - The Complete First Season by James Marshall
Dead Like Me - The Complete Second Season by James
The Departed by Martin Scorsese
Desperado by Robert Rodriguez
The Devil Wears Prada by David Frankel
Dexter - The First Season by Michael Cuesta, Tony Goldwyn
Dick Tracy by Warren Beatty
Die Hard Collection by John McTiernan, Renny Harlin
Dirty Dancing by Emile Ardolino
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Callie Khouri
Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story by Rawson Marshall Thurber
Dog Day Afternoon by Sidney Lumet
Dogma: Special Edition by Kevin Smith
The Doors by
Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb by Stanley Kubrick
The Dukes of Hazzard by Jay Chandrasekhar
Edward Scissorhands by Tim Burton
El Mariachi by Robert Rodriguez
Elizabethtown by Cameron Crowe
The Emperor's Club by Michael Hoffman
Enter the Dragon by Robert Clouse
The Epic Legends Collection by Mel Gibson, Ridley Scott
An Evening with Kevin Smith by J.M. Kenny
An Evening With Kevin Smith 2 - Even ing Harder by Kevin
Ever After - A Cinderella Story by Andy Tennant
Fantastic Four by Tim Story
Fight Club by David Fincher
Finding Neverland by Marc Forster
Firefly - The Complete Series by Joss Whedon, Tim Minear, Vern Gillum
Follow That Dream by Gordon Douglas
Four Brothers by John Singleton
Freaks and Geeks - The Complete Series by
Freaky Friday by Mark Waters (VIII)
Friday Night Lights by Peter Berg
From Hell by Albert Hughes, Allen Hughes
Futurama, Vol. 1 by
Futurama, Vol. 4 by
Ghost by Jerry Zucker
Ghost Whisperer - The Complete First Season by
Ghostbusters I & II Giftset by
Gia by Michael Cristofer
The Girl Next Door by Luke Greenfield
Girl, Interrupted by James Mangold
The Golden Compass by Chris weitz
Gone Baby Gone by Ben Affleck
Gone in 60 Seconds by Dominic Sena
Good Morning, Vietnam by Barry Levinson
Good Will Hunting by Gus Van Sant
Grease by Randa Kleiser
Grease 2 by Patricia Birch
Grey's Anatomy - The Complete Second Season by David
Grind by Casey La Scala
Hackers by Iain Softley
Hairspray by Adam Shankman
Hellboy by Guillermo del Toro
Heroes - Season One by
High School Musical by Kenny Ortega
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Garth Jennings
Hotel Rwanda by Terry George
House of D by David Duchovny
House, M.D. - Season One by
House, M.D. - Season Three by
House, M.D. - Season Two by
I Witness by Rowdy Herrington
I, Robot by Alex Proyas
I'm Not There by Todd Haynes
The Ice Harvest by Harold Ramis
The Incredible Adventures of Wallace and Gromit by Nick
The Incredibles by Brad Bird
Into the Blue by John Stockwell
The Iron Giant by Brad Bird
The Island by Michael Bay
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - Seasons 1 & 2 by
Jackie Brown by
Jarhead by Sam Mendes
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back by Kevin Smith
Jersey Girl by Kevin Smith
Josie and The Pussycats by Kaplan, Deborah
Juno by Jason Reitman
Just Friends by Roger Kumble
Kill Bill - Volume One by Quentin Tarantino
Kill Bill, Volume 2 by Quentin Tarantino
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang by Shane Black
The L Word - The Complete First Season by Tricia Brock, Tony
Labyrinth by Jim Henson
Lara Croft - Tomb Raider by Simon West
Lara Croft Tomb Raider - The Cradle of Life by Jan de Bont
A League of Their Own by Penny Marshall
Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events by Brad
Little Miss Sunshine by Valerie Faris, Jonathan Dayton
Live Free or Die Hard by Len Wiseman
Lord of War by Andrew Niccol
Lords of Dogtown by Catherine Hardwicke
The Lost Boys by Joel Schumacher
A Lot Like Love by Nigel Cole
A Love Song for Bobby Long by Shainee Gabel
Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome by George Miller (II), George Ogilvie
Mallrats by Kevin Smith
Mean Girls by Mark Waters (VIII)
The Mighty Ducks by Stephen Herek
Monty Python and the Holy Grail by Jones, Terry
Moulin Rouge! by Baz Luhrmann
Mr. & Mrs. Smith by Doug Liman
The Mummy Collector's Set by Stephen Sommers
Mystic Pizza by Donald Petrie
Mystic River by Clint Eastwood
Nanny McPhee by Kirk Jones
National Treasure by Jon Turteltaub
Natural Born Killers - Oliver Stone Collection by Oliver Stone
NCIS - The Complete First Season by
The New Guy by Ed Decter
New York Minute by Dennie Gordon
The Nightmare Before Christmas by Henry Selick, Tim Burton
The Notebook by Nick Cassavetes
Now and Then by Lesli Linka Glatter
Nuremberg: The Nazis Facing Their Crimes by Christian
Ocean's 11 by Lewis Milestone
The Office - Season One by
The Office - Season Two by
The Office - Season Three by
Oliver & Company by George Scribner, Clyde Geronimi, Charles A.
Once Upon a Time in Mexico by
Original Sin by Michael Cristofer
The Outsiders by Francis Ford Coppola
Over the Hedge by Karey Kirkpatrick, Tim Johnson
Pan's Labyrinth by Guillermo del Toro
The Phantom of the Opera by Joel Schumacher
Pirates of the Caribbean - Dead Man's Chest by Gore Verbinski
Pirates of the Caribbean - The Curse of the Black Pearl by
Playing By Heart by Willard Carroll
Practical Magic by Griffin Dunne
The Prestige by Christopher Nolan
Pretty in Pink by Howard Deutch
Pretty Woman by Gary Marshall
The Princess Bride by Rob Reiner
The Producers by Susan Stroman
Pushing Tin by Mike Newell
Reefer Madness by Louis J. Gasnier
Rent by Chris Columbus
Reservoir Dogs by Quentin Tarantino
Riding in Cars With Boys by Penny Marshall
The Ringer by Barry W. Blaustein
Road House by Rowdy Herrington
The Road Warrior by George Miller (II)
Robin Williams - Live on Broadway by Marty Callner
Rock 'n Roll High School - Special Edition by Allan Arkush
Rock Star by Stephen Herek
The Rocky Horror Picture Show by Jim Sharman
Roswell - The Complete First Season by Patrick R. Norris
Roswell - The Complete Second Season by Patrick R. Norris
Roswell - The Complete Third Season by Patrick R. Norris
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer by Larry Roemer, Kizo Nagashima
Rumor Has It... by Rob Reiner
The Rundown by Peter Berg
Sahara by Breck Eisner
Saved! by Brian Dannelly
Say Anything by Cameron Crowe
School of Rock by Richard Linklater
Scoop by Woody Allen
Serenity by Joss Whedon
Shall We Dance by Peter Chelsom
Shrek by Andrew Adamson, Vicky Jenson
Siblings by David Weaver
Sin City by Frank Miller, Robert Rodriguez
Sisterhood Of The Travelling Pants by Ken Kwapis
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow by Kerry Conran
Sky High by Mike Mitchell
Sleepy Hollow by Tim Burton
Slither by James Gunn
Smokin' Aces by Joe Carnahan
Spice World by Bob Spiers
St. Elmo's Fire by Joel Schumacher
Stateside by Reverge Anselmo
Stealth by Rob Cohen
Strictly Ballroom by Baz Luhrmann
Sweeney Todd - The Demon Barber of Fleet Street by Tim
Take the Lead by Liz Friedlander
Taking Lives - Director's Cut by D.J. Caruso
Team America - World Police by Trey Parker
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by Steve Barron
Thank You for Smoking by Jason Reitman
Thelma & Louise by Ridley Scott
Titan A.E. by Don Bluth
Tommy by Ken Russell
Transformers by Michael Bay
Tristan and Isolde by Kevin Reynolds
Troy by Wolfgang Petersen
Tru Calling - The Complete Second Season by
Two for the Money by D.J. Caruso
Unbreakable by M. Night Shyamalan
Undiscovered by Meiert Avis
The United States of Leland by Matthew Ryan Hoge
The Usual Suspects by Bryan Singer
V for Vendetta by James McTeigue
Varsity Blues by Brian Robbins
Veronica Mars - The Complete First Season by Rob Thomas
Veronica Mars - The Complete Second Season by Rob Thomas
Veronica Mars - The Complete Third Season by Rob Thomas
Walk the Line by James Mangold
Wallace & Gromit - The Curse of the Were-Rabbit by Steve
We Own the Night by
The Weather Man by Gore Verbinski
The Wedding Date by Claire Kilner
Weeds - Season One
Weeds - Season Three
Weeds - Season Two
Weird Science
West Side Story
What's Eating Gilbert Grape
Who's Better, Who's Best: The Videos
Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory
X-Men
X-Men - The Last Stand
X2 - X-Men United
Young Guns
3:10 to Yuma
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
Across the Universe
The Addams Family
Adventures in Babysitting
The Adventures of Indiana Jones - The Complete DVD Movie Collection
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
Almost Famous - The Director's Cut
American Psycho
Angel - Season One
Angel - Season Three
Angel - Season Two
Angel – Season Four
Angel – Season Five
The Aristocrats
Arrested Development - Season One
Arrested Development - Season Three
Arrested Development - Season Two
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Atlantis - The Lost Empire
Bad News Bears
Batman Begins
Battlestar Galactica - Season One
Battlestar Galactica - Razor
Battlestar Galactica - Season 2.0
Battlestar Galactica - Season Three
Battlestar Galactica: Season 2.5
Benny And Joon
Beyond Borders
Big Fish
Biker Boyz
Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
Billy Madison
Bio-Dome
The Birdcage
Blade
Blade II
Blade Runner: The Final Cut
Blade: Trinity
Blow
Blue Hawaii
The Bone Collector by
Bonnie and Clyde by Arthur Penn
The Boondock Saints - Unrated by Troy Duffy
Breakfast at Tiffany's by Blake Edwards
The Breakfast Club by John Hughes
BtVS - Season 1 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 2 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 3 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 4 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 5 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 6 by Joss Whedon
BtVS - Season 7 by Joss Whedon
Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Fran Rubel Kuzui
Casablanca by Scott Benson (II), Douglas McCarthy, Michael Curtiz
Catch and Release by Susannah Grant
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Tim Burton
Chasing Amy by Kevin Smith
Chicken Little by Mark Dindal
Chocolat by Lasse Hallström
The Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by
Clerks - The Animated Series Uncensored by Steve Loter,
Clerks II by Kevin Smith
Clerks X by Kevin Smith
Clueless by Amy Heckerling
The Commitments by
Corpse Bride by Mike Johnson, Tim Burton
The Covenant by Renny Harlin
Crash by Paul Haggis
Criminal Minds - The First Season by Charles Haid, Richard Shepard
Daredevil by Mark Steven Johnson
Dark Angel - The Complete First Season by
Dark Angel: The Complete Second Season by Kenneth Biller,
The Dark Crystal by Henson, Jim, Oz, Frank
Dawson's Creek - The Complete First Season by James
Dawson's Creek - The Complete Fourth Season by James
Dawson's Creek - The Complete Second Season by James
The Day After Tomorrow by Roland Emmerich
Dazed & Confused by Richard Linklater
Dead Like Me - The Complete First Season by James Marshall
Dead Like Me - The Complete Second Season by James
The Departed by Martin Scorsese
Desperado by Robert Rodriguez
The Devil Wears Prada by David Frankel
Dexter - The First Season by Michael Cuesta, Tony Goldwyn
Dick Tracy by Warren Beatty
Die Hard Collection by John McTiernan, Renny Harlin
Dirty Dancing by Emile Ardolino
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Callie Khouri
Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story by Rawson Marshall Thurber
Dog Day Afternoon by Sidney Lumet
Dogma: Special Edition by Kevin Smith
The Doors by
Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb by Stanley Kubrick
The Dukes of Hazzard by Jay Chandrasekhar
Edward Scissorhands by Tim Burton
El Mariachi by Robert Rodriguez
Elizabethtown by Cameron Crowe
The Emperor's Club by Michael Hoffman
Enter the Dragon by Robert Clouse
The Epic Legends Collection by Mel Gibson, Ridley Scott
An Evening with Kevin Smith by J.M. Kenny
An Evening With Kevin Smith 2 - Even ing Harder by Kevin
Ever After - A Cinderella Story by Andy Tennant
Fantastic Four by Tim Story
Fight Club by David Fincher
Finding Neverland by Marc Forster
Firefly - The Complete Series by Joss Whedon, Tim Minear, Vern Gillum
Follow That Dream by Gordon Douglas
Four Brothers by John Singleton
Freaks and Geeks - The Complete Series by
Freaky Friday by Mark Waters (VIII)
Friday Night Lights by Peter Berg
From Hell by Albert Hughes, Allen Hughes
Futurama, Vol. 1 by
Futurama, Vol. 4 by
Ghost by Jerry Zucker
Ghost Whisperer - The Complete First Season by
Ghostbusters I & II Giftset by
Gia by Michael Cristofer
The Girl Next Door by Luke Greenfield
Girl, Interrupted by James Mangold
The Golden Compass by Chris weitz
Gone Baby Gone by Ben Affleck
Gone in 60 Seconds by Dominic Sena
Good Morning, Vietnam by Barry Levinson
Good Will Hunting by Gus Van Sant
Grease by Randa Kleiser
Grease 2 by Patricia Birch
Grey's Anatomy - The Complete Second Season by David
Grind by Casey La Scala
Hackers by Iain Softley
Hairspray by Adam Shankman
Hellboy by Guillermo del Toro
Heroes - Season One by
High School Musical by Kenny Ortega
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Garth Jennings
Hotel Rwanda by Terry George
House of D by David Duchovny
House, M.D. - Season One by
House, M.D. - Season Three by
House, M.D. - Season Two by
I Witness by Rowdy Herrington
I, Robot by Alex Proyas
I'm Not There by Todd Haynes
The Ice Harvest by Harold Ramis
The Incredible Adventures of Wallace and Gromit by Nick
The Incredibles by Brad Bird
Into the Blue by John Stockwell
The Iron Giant by Brad Bird
The Island by Michael Bay
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - Seasons 1 & 2 by
Jackie Brown by
Jarhead by Sam Mendes
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back by Kevin Smith
Jersey Girl by Kevin Smith
Josie and The Pussycats by Kaplan, Deborah
Juno by Jason Reitman
Just Friends by Roger Kumble
Kill Bill - Volume One by Quentin Tarantino
Kill Bill, Volume 2 by Quentin Tarantino
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang by Shane Black
The L Word - The Complete First Season by Tricia Brock, Tony
Labyrinth by Jim Henson
Lara Croft - Tomb Raider by Simon West
Lara Croft Tomb Raider - The Cradle of Life by Jan de Bont
A League of Their Own by Penny Marshall
Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events by Brad
Little Miss Sunshine by Valerie Faris, Jonathan Dayton
Live Free or Die Hard by Len Wiseman
Lord of War by Andrew Niccol
Lords of Dogtown by Catherine Hardwicke
The Lost Boys by Joel Schumacher
A Lot Like Love by Nigel Cole
A Love Song for Bobby Long by Shainee Gabel
Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome by George Miller (II), George Ogilvie
Mallrats by Kevin Smith
Mean Girls by Mark Waters (VIII)
The Mighty Ducks by Stephen Herek
Monty Python and the Holy Grail by Jones, Terry
Moulin Rouge! by Baz Luhrmann
Mr. & Mrs. Smith by Doug Liman
The Mummy Collector's Set by Stephen Sommers
Mystic Pizza by Donald Petrie
Mystic River by Clint Eastwood
Nanny McPhee by Kirk Jones
National Treasure by Jon Turteltaub
Natural Born Killers - Oliver Stone Collection by Oliver Stone
NCIS - The Complete First Season by
The New Guy by Ed Decter
New York Minute by Dennie Gordon
The Nightmare Before Christmas by Henry Selick, Tim Burton
The Notebook by Nick Cassavetes
Now and Then by Lesli Linka Glatter
Nuremberg: The Nazis Facing Their Crimes by Christian
Ocean's 11 by Lewis Milestone
The Office - Season One by
The Office - Season Two by
The Office - Season Three by
Oliver & Company by George Scribner, Clyde Geronimi, Charles A.
Once Upon a Time in Mexico by
Original Sin by Michael Cristofer
The Outsiders by Francis Ford Coppola
Over the Hedge by Karey Kirkpatrick, Tim Johnson
Pan's Labyrinth by Guillermo del Toro
The Phantom of the Opera by Joel Schumacher
Pirates of the Caribbean - Dead Man's Chest by Gore Verbinski
Pirates of the Caribbean - The Curse of the Black Pearl by
Playing By Heart by Willard Carroll
Practical Magic by Griffin Dunne
The Prestige by Christopher Nolan
Pretty in Pink by Howard Deutch
Pretty Woman by Gary Marshall
The Princess Bride by Rob Reiner
The Producers by Susan Stroman
Pushing Tin by Mike Newell
Reefer Madness by Louis J. Gasnier
Rent by Chris Columbus
Reservoir Dogs by Quentin Tarantino
Riding in Cars With Boys by Penny Marshall
The Ringer by Barry W. Blaustein
Road House by Rowdy Herrington
The Road Warrior by George Miller (II)
Robin Williams - Live on Broadway by Marty Callner
Rock 'n Roll High School - Special Edition by Allan Arkush
Rock Star by Stephen Herek
The Rocky Horror Picture Show by Jim Sharman
Roswell - The Complete First Season by Patrick R. Norris
Roswell - The Complete Second Season by Patrick R. Norris
Roswell - The Complete Third Season by Patrick R. Norris
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer by Larry Roemer, Kizo Nagashima
Rumor Has It... by Rob Reiner
The Rundown by Peter Berg
Sahara by Breck Eisner
Saved! by Brian Dannelly
Say Anything by Cameron Crowe
School of Rock by Richard Linklater
Scoop by Woody Allen
Serenity by Joss Whedon
Shall We Dance by Peter Chelsom
Shrek by Andrew Adamson, Vicky Jenson
Siblings by David Weaver
Sin City by Frank Miller, Robert Rodriguez
Sisterhood Of The Travelling Pants by Ken Kwapis
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow by Kerry Conran
Sky High by Mike Mitchell
Sleepy Hollow by Tim Burton
Slither by James Gunn
Smokin' Aces by Joe Carnahan
Spice World by Bob Spiers
St. Elmo's Fire by Joel Schumacher
Stateside by Reverge Anselmo
Stealth by Rob Cohen
Strictly Ballroom by Baz Luhrmann
Sweeney Todd - The Demon Barber of Fleet Street by Tim
Take the Lead by Liz Friedlander
Taking Lives - Director's Cut by D.J. Caruso
Team America - World Police by Trey Parker
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by Steve Barron
Thank You for Smoking by Jason Reitman
Thelma & Louise by Ridley Scott
Titan A.E. by Don Bluth
Tommy by Ken Russell
Transformers by Michael Bay
Tristan and Isolde by Kevin Reynolds
Troy by Wolfgang Petersen
Tru Calling - The Complete Second Season by
Two for the Money by D.J. Caruso
Unbreakable by M. Night Shyamalan
Undiscovered by Meiert Avis
The United States of Leland by Matthew Ryan Hoge
The Usual Suspects by Bryan Singer
V for Vendetta by James McTeigue
Varsity Blues by Brian Robbins
Veronica Mars - The Complete First Season by Rob Thomas
Veronica Mars - The Complete Second Season by Rob Thomas
Veronica Mars - The Complete Third Season by Rob Thomas
Walk the Line by James Mangold
Wallace & Gromit - The Curse of the Were-Rabbit by Steve
We Own the Night by
The Weather Man by Gore Verbinski
The Wedding Date by Claire Kilner
Weeds - Season One
Weeds - Season Three
Weeds - Season Two
Weird Science
West Side Story
What's Eating Gilbert Grape
Who's Better, Who's Best: The Videos
Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory
X-Men
X-Men - The Last Stand
X2 - X-Men United
Young Guns
Sunday, September 21, 2008
I hate it here.
I try not to. I try to remind myself that I chose this. And that I chose it for a reason. That I should be happy here. I'm not.
I really hate it here.
I really just want to be somewhere that I know people. I want to not have to spend weekends alone in a room that's too small and too cold. I want to know that if I call people they'll hang out. Or show up when they say they will. Or something.
I really hate being alone.
And that's all I ever am in this city.
I really hate it here.
I try not to. I try to remind myself that I chose this. And that I chose it for a reason. That I should be happy here. I'm not.
I really hate it here.
I really just want to be somewhere that I know people. I want to not have to spend weekends alone in a room that's too small and too cold. I want to know that if I call people they'll hang out. Or show up when they say they will. Or something.
I really hate being alone.
And that's all I ever am in this city.
I really hate it here.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
.panic.
I don't know if I can do this.
I don't know if I want to do this.
I don't know if this is who I want to be.
I can't make myself care about anythign here.
I try.
I'm trying.
I just...don't.
I feel like I'm missing something.
That there's this giant "big picture" that everyone can see but me.
I don't think I'm on this big picture.
I don't think I have a picture at all.
I hate living alone.
I don't know if I want to do this.
I don't know if this is who I want to be.
I can't make myself care about anythign here.
I try.
I'm trying.
I just...don't.
I feel like I'm missing something.
That there's this giant "big picture" that everyone can see but me.
I don't think I'm on this big picture.
I don't think I have a picture at all.
I hate living alone.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Moved.
April 25th was a very long time ago. I'm aware of that. At the same time I had to sit down and think for a few moments about how momentously my world has changed.
The big and insanely obvious one is that I moved.
For a lot of people thats a very trivial thing to say. People move all the time. It isn't really a big deal for someone to move. But it really is.
I moved away from the onyl place I've ever lived. I didn't just move down the street. I moved provinces. I moved five hours away from the only place I've ever called home. Not just the house, but the city. I moved away from everyone I love and everyone who loves me. It was a very big thing. It still is, and I'm not really sure if it has sunk in yet.
Sometimes I walk around the apartment like I'm in a hotel, or I'm just chillin' here for a while. Every once in a while however, it hits me. This is where I live. This is my apartment. This is my place. In effect, this is my home. It's a very big adn terrifying and beautiful thought.
I miss home. There are some days I miss home so much it physically hurts. Some days I don't notice that I'm not at home. Some days i feel like I've always lived here and this is how it's always been. Those are the scariest thoughts of all.
I miss my family. I see my parents more often than anyone else I know who lives away from home. I don't know if that makes it easier or harder. I should have taken time off this summer and spent time with my family. That was a mistake that I'm not going to be able to repair. I don't think I'm ready to be on my own, but I don't think anyone really is.
I miss my friends. I don't know very many people here. Those I do know, I don't know well and I haven't seen in a very long time. I'm sure we aren't the same people we were. I miss being able to call any number of people when I was bored. I miss doing nothing with people who don't know that they mean as much as they do.
This new city is big. I never thought of home as small until I looked out my balcony one night and couldn't see where this city ended. It was almost smothering. I have to remind myself that it isn't as bad as it seems so I don't find myself becoming very claustrophobic. Something I didn't know I was until I moved here.
I started in a new school. I started a new degree. I did this alone. I can't remember a time when I didn't know anybody at a place I was going. I always knew someone, I always had a safety net. I don't have one here. I've made friends. Which is actually quite a feat for me. I usually let the few friends I have make friends and then sort of latch onto them. I'm quite proud of this.
I've officially started my life. It would be a lie to say I wasn't petrified. Because I am. I'm overwhelmed, scared, proud, uncomfortable, calm, frantic, sad, angry, and alone. But overall I'm okay. At least I will be soon.
QUOTE: If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there - Lewis Carroll
The big and insanely obvious one is that I moved.
For a lot of people thats a very trivial thing to say. People move all the time. It isn't really a big deal for someone to move. But it really is.
I moved away from the onyl place I've ever lived. I didn't just move down the street. I moved provinces. I moved five hours away from the only place I've ever called home. Not just the house, but the city. I moved away from everyone I love and everyone who loves me. It was a very big thing. It still is, and I'm not really sure if it has sunk in yet.
Sometimes I walk around the apartment like I'm in a hotel, or I'm just chillin' here for a while. Every once in a while however, it hits me. This is where I live. This is my apartment. This is my place. In effect, this is my home. It's a very big adn terrifying and beautiful thought.
I miss home. There are some days I miss home so much it physically hurts. Some days I don't notice that I'm not at home. Some days i feel like I've always lived here and this is how it's always been. Those are the scariest thoughts of all.
I miss my family. I see my parents more often than anyone else I know who lives away from home. I don't know if that makes it easier or harder. I should have taken time off this summer and spent time with my family. That was a mistake that I'm not going to be able to repair. I don't think I'm ready to be on my own, but I don't think anyone really is.
I miss my friends. I don't know very many people here. Those I do know, I don't know well and I haven't seen in a very long time. I'm sure we aren't the same people we were. I miss being able to call any number of people when I was bored. I miss doing nothing with people who don't know that they mean as much as they do.
This new city is big. I never thought of home as small until I looked out my balcony one night and couldn't see where this city ended. It was almost smothering. I have to remind myself that it isn't as bad as it seems so I don't find myself becoming very claustrophobic. Something I didn't know I was until I moved here.
I started in a new school. I started a new degree. I did this alone. I can't remember a time when I didn't know anybody at a place I was going. I always knew someone, I always had a safety net. I don't have one here. I've made friends. Which is actually quite a feat for me. I usually let the few friends I have make friends and then sort of latch onto them. I'm quite proud of this.
I've officially started my life. It would be a lie to say I wasn't petrified. Because I am. I'm overwhelmed, scared, proud, uncomfortable, calm, frantic, sad, angry, and alone. But overall I'm okay. At least I will be soon.
QUOTE: If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there - Lewis Carroll
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Monday, April 16, 2007
Tommy's mum found out, but he put the blame on me and Ray
some things i've been pondering.....
am i really grown up enough to live on my own?
why are some covers of songs better than the original? for example The Ataris' cover of Boys of Summer vs. the original, and the Dixie Chicks' Landslide vs. the Stevie Nicks original.
Why is the Punisher in a very Captain America-esque outfit?
Why is everything Joss Whedon touches so damn good?
and finally, would i really bother coming back?
BOWIE!QUOTE: I had to resign myself, many years ago, that I'm not too articulate when it comes to explaining how I feel about things. But my music does it for me, it really does.
am i really grown up enough to live on my own?
why are some covers of songs better than the original? for example The Ataris' cover of Boys of Summer vs. the original, and the Dixie Chicks' Landslide vs. the Stevie Nicks original.
Why is the Punisher in a very Captain America-esque outfit?
Why is everything Joss Whedon touches so damn good?
and finally, would i really bother coming back?
BOWIE!QUOTE: I had to resign myself, many years ago, that I'm not too articulate when it comes to explaining how I feel about things. But my music does it for me, it really does.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Tommy lit a fire one day, nearly burned the field away
So....Edmonton....that's the plan at least.
I guess it's finally time to get off my ass and 'make something of myself'.
It's a scary thought.
Now I just have to finish filling out my application, get my transcripts, and write a portfolio. The first two should be painless. As for the portfolio....I kind of want to throw up just thinking about writing it. I don't write nonfiction. I'm no good at it.
It's sort of like starting all over again. Which I'm not too crazy about.
I bought the Outsiders today....it didn't make me feel any better. Also, I didn't get tickets to 300, so now I have to go tomorrow. That probably made me feel worse.
In four more years I'll have a Bachelor of Applied Communications in Professional Writing.
I still don't know what that means.
I guess it's finally time to get off my ass and 'make something of myself'.
It's a scary thought.
Now I just have to finish filling out my application, get my transcripts, and write a portfolio. The first two should be painless. As for the portfolio....I kind of want to throw up just thinking about writing it. I don't write nonfiction. I'm no good at it.
It's sort of like starting all over again. Which I'm not too crazy about.
I bought the Outsiders today....it didn't make me feel any better. Also, I didn't get tickets to 300, so now I have to go tomorrow. That probably made me feel worse.
In four more years I'll have a Bachelor of Applied Communications in Professional Writing.
I still don't know what that means.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Tony climbed a tree and fell, trying hard to touch the sky
Okay so....I know I never post in here. And that sucks. For me. Because that means I'm breaking a promise I made to myself - and those are the most important kind. I just haven't had anything to write about.....until now.
I just found out the most depressing news.
Joss Whedon dropped out of the Wonderwoman movie.
yeah. i know.
It actually breaks my heart a little bit because i know that he would have stayed true to the comics...and now whoever takes it over won't. And because I miss Joss Whedon like no one's business. I mean Season 8 is coming eventually...but even that's not enough. I really wanted him to do this movie, it has SO much potential. ugh. I'm broken.
You can read all about it here.
I'm going to cry now.
I just found out the most depressing news.
Joss Whedon dropped out of the Wonderwoman movie.
yeah. i know.
It actually breaks my heart a little bit because i know that he would have stayed true to the comics...and now whoever takes it over won't. And because I miss Joss Whedon like no one's business. I mean Season 8 is coming eventually...but even that's not enough. I really wanted him to do this movie, it has SO much potential. ugh. I'm broken.
You can read all about it here.
I'm going to cry now.
Monday, January 22, 2007
But we will be, very shortly
I really should be reading for Art History. I mean, it's not like I have anything profound to write about. Or anything to write about at all.
I started watching House. I realize I'm late in jumping on that bandwagon, but at least I came around. Now, it can be argued that the show is unrealistic. But it is on television. At least they didn't put it in space. Or a shire.
All of the medical problems that arrive at the doorstep of Dr. House, are real and treatable. I checked. So what makes this show so much better than ER, or Grey's Anatomy? Okay, bad idea. You can't compare three shows like that. They aren't about the same thing. They may all be set in a hospital, but they aren't about the same things. Grey's Anatomy has chosen to focus on the lives of the interns, the relationships that they go through, the surgeries they want, the trials and tribulations that it takes them through to get to where they want to be. And it's entertaining, and funny, and a lot of times ridiculous. But the characters are strong, they don't flip flop between being two different personas, like a lot of television characters do. And they're realistic. I know a few guys like Alex, and more than one girl like Meredith.
Er should just admit that it's run is over. It won't, but it should. ER has always focused on the insanity that is an emergency room. Thus the namesake. The characters are interchangeable through the seasons, it doesn't matter that George Clooney left because now there's a John Stamos, who might as well have kept the characters name. ER is a revolving door, despite the fact that only one person has come out of it with a recognizable career, people still jump at the chance to play doctor whatever on season 97.
House is a different story. It focuses around one person, the asshole who is too smart for his own good and knows it. There are a bunch of other characters, who I'm sure everyone can relate to...that is of course the purpose of a supporting character. But House is honest and blunt...a little crazy....and mean. He's definitly a character. The main complaint I've heard about this show is that they don't just let doctors work like that. You can't have a trial and error on a patient. My response to that is to laugh wholeheartedly at your naivety. Of course House is always going to come up right because it's a TV show, and no one would watch it if he kept killing people. Well....I would. But I doubt many other people would. I watch House because I wish people were that blunt. It would make life easier..and more comical. I watch it because it's funny, and because it's available to rent.
I will continue to watch Grey's Anatomy....I'm not too sure about ER, not that I ever watched it religiously, but it's run it's course...twice. But now I think I'll add House to my fandom list.
There's always room for one more.
Oh and in case Dr. Wilson looks familiar and you can't figure out what from...he was Neil in Dead Poet's Society.
BOWIE!QUOTE: I believe that I often bring out the best in somebody's talents.
I started watching House. I realize I'm late in jumping on that bandwagon, but at least I came around. Now, it can be argued that the show is unrealistic. But it is on television. At least they didn't put it in space. Or a shire.
All of the medical problems that arrive at the doorstep of Dr. House, are real and treatable. I checked. So what makes this show so much better than ER, or Grey's Anatomy? Okay, bad idea. You can't compare three shows like that. They aren't about the same thing. They may all be set in a hospital, but they aren't about the same things. Grey's Anatomy has chosen to focus on the lives of the interns, the relationships that they go through, the surgeries they want, the trials and tribulations that it takes them through to get to where they want to be. And it's entertaining, and funny, and a lot of times ridiculous. But the characters are strong, they don't flip flop between being two different personas, like a lot of television characters do. And they're realistic. I know a few guys like Alex, and more than one girl like Meredith.
Er should just admit that it's run is over. It won't, but it should. ER has always focused on the insanity that is an emergency room. Thus the namesake. The characters are interchangeable through the seasons, it doesn't matter that George Clooney left because now there's a John Stamos, who might as well have kept the characters name. ER is a revolving door, despite the fact that only one person has come out of it with a recognizable career, people still jump at the chance to play doctor whatever on season 97.
House is a different story. It focuses around one person, the asshole who is too smart for his own good and knows it. There are a bunch of other characters, who I'm sure everyone can relate to...that is of course the purpose of a supporting character. But House is honest and blunt...a little crazy....and mean. He's definitly a character. The main complaint I've heard about this show is that they don't just let doctors work like that. You can't have a trial and error on a patient. My response to that is to laugh wholeheartedly at your naivety. Of course House is always going to come up right because it's a TV show, and no one would watch it if he kept killing people. Well....I would. But I doubt many other people would. I watch House because I wish people were that blunt. It would make life easier..and more comical. I watch it because it's funny, and because it's available to rent.
I will continue to watch Grey's Anatomy....I'm not too sure about ER, not that I ever watched it religiously, but it's run it's course...twice. But now I think I'll add House to my fandom list.
There's always room for one more.
Oh and in case Dr. Wilson looks familiar and you can't figure out what from...he was Neil in Dead Poet's Society.
BOWIE!QUOTE: I believe that I often bring out the best in somebody's talents.
Friday, January 19, 2007
Intermission
I'm fucking terrified right now. No jokes. I'm holed up in my room, every light in the house on, cowering in a corner with a steak knife terrified. This is what happens when you turn 21. I'm never watching television alone in dark house again. Ever.
My house makes weird noises.
Also, I don't know how to work the thermostat so I'm freezing. Apparently telling my parents I would be fine while they went away for a leisurely weekend at the coast was a big fucking lie.
I'm pretty sure I should not sleep with this steak knife, but i'm having trouble putting it down.
My stomach hurts. It might be the bag of marshmallows I had for dinner. Or the brownies I had for lunch.
Steph was supposed to message me back so I didn't go crazy. She didn't.
I got a shiny new belt buckle today. Even that thought didn't make me any less terrified. But I just heard a very weird noise and I didn't like it one bit.
I wonder if anyone has ever been murdered mid-blog.
Okay let's never think that thought again.
I hope my dogs okay. I'm assuming she is. I'd go down and check on her but I'm a bit too busy freaking out.
This is not a fun way to spend a Thursday night.
If I don't get some sleep school is going to be heinous tomorrow.
And I really have to go to class because I haven't been going, and it's important to go.
I'm fucking terrified.
My house makes weird noises.
Also, I don't know how to work the thermostat so I'm freezing. Apparently telling my parents I would be fine while they went away for a leisurely weekend at the coast was a big fucking lie.
I'm pretty sure I should not sleep with this steak knife, but i'm having trouble putting it down.
My stomach hurts. It might be the bag of marshmallows I had for dinner. Or the brownies I had for lunch.
Steph was supposed to message me back so I didn't go crazy. She didn't.
I got a shiny new belt buckle today. Even that thought didn't make me any less terrified. But I just heard a very weird noise and I didn't like it one bit.
I wonder if anyone has ever been murdered mid-blog.
Okay let's never think that thought again.
I hope my dogs okay. I'm assuming she is. I'd go down and check on her but I'm a bit too busy freaking out.
This is not a fun way to spend a Thursday night.
If I don't get some sleep school is going to be heinous tomorrow.
And I really have to go to class because I haven't been going, and it's important to go.
I'm fucking terrified.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
It's only 5 o'clock, and we're not tired yet
Okay......in case anyone has been wondering what's been up.
My computer hates me. No jokes. Right now I'm writing from the university. But yeah, Windows crashed (again). So i had to reformat my computer. Luckily Brett was there to help. But for those of you who don't know......reformatting your computer means everything you ahev on your C drive gets deleted. And although I have a brand spankin' new external harddrive I wasn't even a third of the way done backing up my shit. So that meant that two thirds of everything on my C drive was going to be lost....by this point i was crying on the inside.....then we tried to take my computer apart. Literally. We took my computer apart into several little pieces.....Dell sucks by the way because you can't jsut life off the bottom. So that failed. Then we were going to try an install Windows on a different partition. I didn't know you could ahve partitions on your hard drive...then only excuse i haev for that is that i'm a girl. Cliched or not, that's my excuse. That didn't work either. And Windows wouldn't install on my external hard drive because Windows is a bastard. By this time it's been almost two hours of Brett wracking his brain trying to figure out what the hell to do.
We went on the internet....it's a handy tool.
We found out how to get the hard drive out of the computer, it's seriously more complicated than it sounds i promise. So he took my harddrive and did some computer voodoo, and managed to put my hard drive in his computer so that he could download everything onto my external hard drive, his name is Otto.
So then once everything was on my external hard drive we deleted the little laptop harddrive (Billybob). Then reinstalled windows. WE watched Space Jam too. But now i don't have any of the drivers for my laptop. So we spent another half hour trying to figure out what the hell came with my computer. Then dwonloading the right drivers, because while i'm sure my computer came with a disk....i have no idea where the hell it would be. I'm that organized. so now i have to try and remember what the hell Dave, my moms tech guy from work, did to our computers to allow us onto the internet.
The point of this entire rant is back up your shit. And soemtimes it's a good thing that professors hadn out readings and handouts. Because when your computer crashes and you can't get onto the internet.....life sucks. A lot.
Plus side....now my computer is set up so that if it ever crashes again everythign will be safe. I made a new harddrive partition. Don't ask me how. But i did.
And I finally got the rest of Beth's Christmas present so i don't feel like such a dick.
OH and I turn 21 on Friday. Which I'm not too psyched about, but I will be at Whiskey Jacks all night so everyone should come and sing me kareoke......preferably something from the 80's, and i like when it's offkey. Seriously, it amkes it better.
All fo this has made em decide that I'm not going to class. I have to brave the shitty ass weather and go home and fix my computer because I have to download everythign again. Like antivirus shit....and limewire....and other things to help me steal.
Random thought...what is in the Anarchist's Cookbook? I mean....other than bomb shit. I'm curious.
As for school......my English class is getting better, I like learning about trashy dime novels. Um...My social control class, whcih is starting right now, is.....decent. I wanted to learn about crazy people. That's cool though, the prof is pretty cool. He sounds like donald sutherland. My Roman Civilization class, which i was told would be easy.....isn't. IT's a lot of reading, and all of it's online, needless to say I haven't got a alot done. My Art History class is good, the teacher is a crazy bitch, think Samantha from Sex and ther City if she had Charlotte's job. And she's all over the place, so my notes are insane, but it'll be cool.
Okay i'm done, and going home.
i don't have my Bowie quotes with me.....
My computer hates me. No jokes. Right now I'm writing from the university. But yeah, Windows crashed (again). So i had to reformat my computer. Luckily Brett was there to help. But for those of you who don't know......reformatting your computer means everything you ahev on your C drive gets deleted. And although I have a brand spankin' new external harddrive I wasn't even a third of the way done backing up my shit. So that meant that two thirds of everything on my C drive was going to be lost....by this point i was crying on the inside.....then we tried to take my computer apart. Literally. We took my computer apart into several little pieces.....Dell sucks by the way because you can't jsut life off the bottom. So that failed. Then we were going to try an install Windows on a different partition. I didn't know you could ahve partitions on your hard drive...then only excuse i haev for that is that i'm a girl. Cliched or not, that's my excuse. That didn't work either. And Windows wouldn't install on my external hard drive because Windows is a bastard. By this time it's been almost two hours of Brett wracking his brain trying to figure out what the hell to do.
We went on the internet....it's a handy tool.
We found out how to get the hard drive out of the computer, it's seriously more complicated than it sounds i promise. So he took my harddrive and did some computer voodoo, and managed to put my hard drive in his computer so that he could download everything onto my external hard drive, his name is Otto.
So then once everything was on my external hard drive we deleted the little laptop harddrive (Billybob). Then reinstalled windows. WE watched Space Jam too. But now i don't have any of the drivers for my laptop. So we spent another half hour trying to figure out what the hell came with my computer. Then dwonloading the right drivers, because while i'm sure my computer came with a disk....i have no idea where the hell it would be. I'm that organized. so now i have to try and remember what the hell Dave, my moms tech guy from work, did to our computers to allow us onto the internet.
The point of this entire rant is back up your shit. And soemtimes it's a good thing that professors hadn out readings and handouts. Because when your computer crashes and you can't get onto the internet.....life sucks. A lot.
Plus side....now my computer is set up so that if it ever crashes again everythign will be safe. I made a new harddrive partition. Don't ask me how. But i did.
And I finally got the rest of Beth's Christmas present so i don't feel like such a dick.
OH and I turn 21 on Friday. Which I'm not too psyched about, but I will be at Whiskey Jacks all night so everyone should come and sing me kareoke......preferably something from the 80's, and i like when it's offkey. Seriously, it amkes it better.
All fo this has made em decide that I'm not going to class. I have to brave the shitty ass weather and go home and fix my computer because I have to download everythign again. Like antivirus shit....and limewire....and other things to help me steal.
Random thought...what is in the Anarchist's Cookbook? I mean....other than bomb shit. I'm curious.
As for school......my English class is getting better, I like learning about trashy dime novels. Um...My social control class, whcih is starting right now, is.....decent. I wanted to learn about crazy people. That's cool though, the prof is pretty cool. He sounds like donald sutherland. My Roman Civilization class, which i was told would be easy.....isn't. IT's a lot of reading, and all of it's online, needless to say I haven't got a alot done. My Art History class is good, the teacher is a crazy bitch, think Samantha from Sex and ther City if she had Charlotte's job. And she's all over the place, so my notes are insane, but it'll be cool.
Okay i'm done, and going home.
i don't have my Bowie quotes with me.....
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